Barney Stinson’s Legendary Theories!

No matter how immature he is, I think we can all agree that he is awesomely awesome. I can help to think that he is my favorite character in “How I Met Your Mother”. All of his “Bro Code”, “Legen.. wait for it, dary!”, “Seriously, Boobs?”, and not to forget “Suit up!”. Oh and the “Up top!” and “What up!” things. And the top of his awesomely insanely ingeniousness are all of his insanely awesomely theories! Insane but make sense. Here they are:

The Lemon Law

The Lemon Law is similar in nature to lemon laws for used cars (Lemon laws are American state laws that provide a remedy for purchasers of cars in order to compensate for cars that repeatedly fail to meet standards of quality and performance), Barney’s new lemon law for dating gives a person five minutes to decide if the date will go on for the rest of the night or not. They can call the date off for any reason in the first five minutes, avoiding bad dates.

The Olive Theory

People who like olives are attracted to those who do not. It similar to “Opposite Attractive”, only this one is interpret literally. Yup, that’s how awesome Barney is.

The Hot/Crazy Scale

Certain women’s increase in physical attractiveness has been disproportionate to their increase in psychosis. In other words, for some women, the hotter she is, the crazier she can get. A person is allowed to be crazy, as long as they are equally hot. Ideally, you want your date to be above the diagonal line, indicating that they are hotter than they are crazy.

The Platinum Rule

The platinum rule that says “Never, ever, ever, love thy neighbor.” It seems that Barney thinks (make) love (to) your neighbor only brings chaos. His point was that one should never date someone seen on a regular basis, e.g. someone at the same workplace, a next door neighbor, etc. because such relationships never work out in the end and lead to never-ending suffering, as those involved would see each other constantly. You will eventually have to go through this eight steps:

  1. Attraction
  2. Bargaining
  3. Submission
  4. Perks
  5. The Tipping Point
  6. Purgatory
  7. Confrontation
  8. Fallout

The Cheerleaders Effect

It’s when you see a group of girls or guys and they look hot, but when you see each person individually they are not, that an effect, when they are in groups they look hot.

The Mermaid Theory

The Mermaid Theory proves that a chick’s hotness – as measured in units of how much you want to bone her – increases in direct proportion to the time exposed to her. No matter how hot or not hot a woman is, eventually you will want to sleep with her. The time it takes for this process to occur is the chick’s “Mermaid Clock.” It starts the first time you lay eyes on a chick, and stops ticking the instant you want to get your jam on.

That’s all about. Insane, huh. Check out for more insane theory of Barney Stinson here.


2 thoughts on “Barney Stinson’s Legendary Theories!

  1. what about if you wanna see if a woman has had kids look at her wrists
    or the freeway theory 6 hours, 4 days, 3 weeks, 7 months and so on.

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